How rude am I?

Dang how rude was that last post? I am truly sorry for that. I didn't mean to come across as ungrateful or mean in basically saying, "don't call me I don't want to talk to you." The truth is, I know a couple of you have tried to reach me by phone the past week or so and I haven't answered or returned your calls. I felt that you deserved an explaination. And that's what that last post was supposed to be. In retrospect, though, it sounded awful and I am ashamed of it. For that I sincerely apologize.

I love you guys and I appreciate you all being there for me. Lately I've felt quite lonely simply because I just don't feel well enough to get up off the couch. My dad may say I'm being lazy but that's not true. I am worn out from the chemo and the flu shot and the damn cancer. And in all honesty, that's all that's going on in my life and I'm sick of talking about it! So, if any of you have some spare time in the coming weeks, especially after my Big Nasty on the 29th, and don't mind just coming over to sit and visit, I would love your company! I'd love to see you face to face and hear about your kids or your work or your significant others or your cats or your school work or your pet rocks! I'd love to hear anything but illness, cancer, and "coping." If our converstaions start dwelling too much on me and my illness, I'll let you know and we'll just change the subject! It's that easy!

And for those of you who are out-of-towners who can't just drop by, then send me an email! I love to write (obviously) and I have been known to turn a simple email exchange into a lengthy and ongoing conversation. For example, Maggie and I have been swapping emails about a particular topic, both writing long, expressive paragraphs to each other, for about three weeks now! It does take some getting used to but it's easy once you blur the lines a little. After my last Big Nasty, though, I didn't want to even touch my laptop for a couple of weeks. Maybe that won't be the case this time around but I'm just warning you that right after that I may be making up for lost phone time, if ya know what I mean? :) Of course, I'll have Mr. Honey log in and give ya'll some catch-up posts every few days. And maybe I will be emailing, though not quite as lengthy or quickly as normal.

Otherwise, my phone will be on again next week. I just haven't been in the mood and I wanted to apologize for that. Give me a few more days of being a phone hermit and we'll be back in business!

Thank you for being patient with me. I love you all!